Last night, I learned that one of my cousins on my dad's side passed away. It was a tragic tale of drug overdose. While I was not very close to him due to a large age gap, I was close to his siblings, and I can't help feeling heavy for them, even though we haven't seen each other for many years.
What do you do in a situation like this? There are no words to properly emote feelings of empathy. Distance and time makes things hard, almost awkward. My dad's side of the family is terrible at sitting with uncomfortable emotions, so when my dad found out, he just kind of brushed it to the side. But my mother, the leader of the tribe, she knew what to do.
"Get me a phone, I need to call their mom."
So, she called my aunt. And as soon as their two voices exchanged a hello, they both sobbed. I, who really couldn't cry before this, feeling too separated, too distant, started crying. It was a powerful moment of two mothers weeping over a son. How many times throughout history has this happened before? How many needless, tragic deaths have been caused by illness, war, murder, or drugs, all ending in a mother's tears?
It's strange... I've been pondering death, not really in a morbid way, but in a very real way. When death is close, it makes you aware of what is precious. I think we in the west are too far removed from death. We become cloistered, neurotic, and spiteful, thinking that we have forever to argue about petty, trifle matters. But we don't, we really don't... We only have a short while. So be aware, be tender, be gentle, for death is only a breath away...
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